I was sat thinking over the past few days about what I have accomplished thus far and what I was always told growing up about what I was supposed to do. Many times as a child we are told we are going to be this or that, or cannot do this or that. Steady jobs, wife, kids, mortgage, and told that as long as we have a good education behind us we can be just like the jones' next door.
I was told by people around 10 years ago that I would never be able to train with the best people, never move past being in a normal karate class, and should be grateful for the things I know and where I had come from and to stick to what it was that I had worked so hard for.
It was a bad time in my life a few years back when Jayne ( my fiance ) decided that I had goals, dreams and aspirations but at the time I could not even be bothered to get out of bed, leave the house, talk to friends or loved ones, and cried at the drop of a hat. I had managed to get depressed, something I had only been once in my life and even then only partially. The thought of moving forward with my life terrified me, the thought of going back petrified me. I was stuck. Stuck like an overweight guy in a sweet shop contemplating all the things I wanted but didnt know what to choose. Frozen with fear, frozen with the ideas that I could and never would be good enough to do anything I had dared to dream about.
Knocked back by all the nay sayers over the years. Knocked back by all the school bullies from years of torment and verbal and physical abuse, wondering if not knowing they were right and I was destined to be just like the people who shot me down.
Jayne, dropped an Email to GT ( Geoff ). A man who needs to explanation, asking about spaces left on his masterclass, I had already trained in a few arts before, but nothing where I had wanted to continue into a ripe old age. The mail came back saying there was a space. It was about 10pm that night she told that geoff had mailed her back and confirmed I could have a place. As she told me, All my fears came and hit my in one massive shot, Like a shotgun at point blank range, could I handle it, could I walk into class, could I complete what was asked of me, would I be good enough, would all these people who had shot me down be right?
I took a walk, not far, and not long, but long enough for something to finally snap inside of me, F*** it I said. The mail was sent back, and that was it I thought. A call came in from Sharon a few days later telling me my place had been confirmed. I got off the phone and jumped around like a mad man, then stopped. OH CRAP... here it was My chance to move forward with something I had always wanted to do but never had the guts.
The class came, and went as they do. full of fear I walked in, only to be greeted by loads of people with the same fear I had, was this normal I thought. All these people well accomplished in their own arts, lives, jobs, and feeling the same as I do. Scared stupid about to embark on a new chapter?. Class after class my confidence grew, so much that people started to notice a change, and before I knew it I WAS BACK. but not as before, stronger, stronger than I had ever been and wanting more from life than anyone thinks is possible.
Anyone and everyone has times when they have these feelings. I still wake and feel scared, but not so scared as I cant put into action things which I want to do. We do not just stay stagnant as a species, we evolve, we learn, we change, into something better each and every day. but this cannot be done within ourselves if we are not willing to put ourselves out there. If we can move past that which scares us, and that which everyone else associates as the norm, we can and will move forward to a life we deserve and the one we are destined to have. the job we feel is not a job because we love it so much, the family we have we see in a different light, the friends who back us and not try and hold us back.
Over the past few years I have made some very good friends, and ones who support me and are there for me, and I them. friends from class and new friends along the way. ones who share ventures, and adventures and ones who are just there if I need someone to listen or give me a kick in the A&& to move forward and take that extra step.
Al, Mick, Geoff, Pete, Bob, all you guys on here have passed on advice and friendship among others. Rick on here for being my partner in this forum with everyone elses help, the seminar which is upcoming. everything we do is positive. and it is only the beginning.
So in closing, Get out there, find those who inspire you, talk to them, pick their brains, get help to do whatever it is you want to do and be.
the one thing I learned from all my friends above.
Anything and I mean Anything is possible. Get started and spread the word guys.
Craig
x
I was told by people around 10 years ago that I would never be able to train with the best people, never move past being in a normal karate class, and should be grateful for the things I know and where I had come from and to stick to what it was that I had worked so hard for.
It was a bad time in my life a few years back when Jayne ( my fiance ) decided that I had goals, dreams and aspirations but at the time I could not even be bothered to get out of bed, leave the house, talk to friends or loved ones, and cried at the drop of a hat. I had managed to get depressed, something I had only been once in my life and even then only partially. The thought of moving forward with my life terrified me, the thought of going back petrified me. I was stuck. Stuck like an overweight guy in a sweet shop contemplating all the things I wanted but didnt know what to choose. Frozen with fear, frozen with the ideas that I could and never would be good enough to do anything I had dared to dream about.
Knocked back by all the nay sayers over the years. Knocked back by all the school bullies from years of torment and verbal and physical abuse, wondering if not knowing they were right and I was destined to be just like the people who shot me down.
Jayne, dropped an Email to GT ( Geoff ). A man who needs to explanation, asking about spaces left on his masterclass, I had already trained in a few arts before, but nothing where I had wanted to continue into a ripe old age. The mail came back saying there was a space. It was about 10pm that night she told that geoff had mailed her back and confirmed I could have a place. As she told me, All my fears came and hit my in one massive shot, Like a shotgun at point blank range, could I handle it, could I walk into class, could I complete what was asked of me, would I be good enough, would all these people who had shot me down be right?
I took a walk, not far, and not long, but long enough for something to finally snap inside of me, F*** it I said. The mail was sent back, and that was it I thought. A call came in from Sharon a few days later telling me my place had been confirmed. I got off the phone and jumped around like a mad man, then stopped. OH CRAP... here it was My chance to move forward with something I had always wanted to do but never had the guts.
The class came, and went as they do. full of fear I walked in, only to be greeted by loads of people with the same fear I had, was this normal I thought. All these people well accomplished in their own arts, lives, jobs, and feeling the same as I do. Scared stupid about to embark on a new chapter?. Class after class my confidence grew, so much that people started to notice a change, and before I knew it I WAS BACK. but not as before, stronger, stronger than I had ever been and wanting more from life than anyone thinks is possible.
Anyone and everyone has times when they have these feelings. I still wake and feel scared, but not so scared as I cant put into action things which I want to do. We do not just stay stagnant as a species, we evolve, we learn, we change, into something better each and every day. but this cannot be done within ourselves if we are not willing to put ourselves out there. If we can move past that which scares us, and that which everyone else associates as the norm, we can and will move forward to a life we deserve and the one we are destined to have. the job we feel is not a job because we love it so much, the family we have we see in a different light, the friends who back us and not try and hold us back.
Over the past few years I have made some very good friends, and ones who support me and are there for me, and I them. friends from class and new friends along the way. ones who share ventures, and adventures and ones who are just there if I need someone to listen or give me a kick in the A&& to move forward and take that extra step.
Al, Mick, Geoff, Pete, Bob, all you guys on here have passed on advice and friendship among others. Rick on here for being my partner in this forum with everyone elses help, the seminar which is upcoming. everything we do is positive. and it is only the beginning.
So in closing, Get out there, find those who inspire you, talk to them, pick their brains, get help to do whatever it is you want to do and be.
the one thing I learned from all my friends above.
Anything and I mean Anything is possible. Get started and spread the word guys.
Craig
x